ARTICLES

Poor Saint Sebastian

Roman Soldier Icon for Gay Priests Group

By Allyson Smith

St. Sebastian's Angels, an Internet "support group for Gay Religious Brothers and Clergy of the Roman Catholic Church" opens its website with the young saint pierced by arrows. An estimated 55 priests from throughout the United States and several foreign countries, including the auxiliary bishop of Capetown, South Africa and the superior of a men's order in San Diego, have conducted chatroom conversations and shared sexual photographs on the site.

The website describes itself as "an area where men in orders and/or vows can share their lives and talk about their problems, concerns, joys and sorrows. It also seeks to be that place of spiritual as well as relational friendships. It understands that the Roman Catholic Church is struggling with the issue of homosexuality and the teachings of Christ as understood by the Roman Catholic Church...."

The Roman Catholic Faithful, an orthodox group led by Steven Brady in Petersburg, Illinois, first learned of St. Sebastian's, which began about a year ago, in September. Said Brady, "We were given the address of the site, with the photos of the priests and the bishop, by a concerned Catholic. I was able to go directly to that site; you did not have to be a member or have a password to do so.... We contacted a prominent Catholic priest who gave us some direction and some other clergy who gave us exact direction. We then contacted the papal nuncio but he wasn't interested. We also faxed Cardinals George, Bevilacqua, Hickey, O'Connor, and Law. All we got back was a fax in response from Cardinal George (of Chicago) saying he didn't want to access the site." Because of the lack of response from the Church hierarchy, Brady decided to announce the website publicly on his own website on January 14. "We didn't have anywhere else to turn; no one seemed interested."

Brady's website contains copies of the Sebastian website, as it appeared on September 9, 1999 and December 22, 1999. These snapshots display photos of some members, some in their clerical garb, as well as e-mail addresses and, in some cases, internet home page addresses. It contains dirty photos, including an animated photo of an ejaculating penis and an "upskirt" shot of male genitalia, taken from underneath a man wearing a kilt. The site also has a copy of the angry letter written by the webmaster, a priest from Maine, when told that the website had been discovered.

The chatroom conversations reveal the thinking shared by these men. The head of the Vatican's Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger, is a target of scorn throughout the conversations, often compared to a Nazi. Orthodox laity are termed "misguided," "despots," and "self-styled defenders of the faith," who possess a "myopic mindset." At least one priest expressed the wish that Pope John Paul II would die.

Said Brady, "A priest has usually 10 years of education. These are educated men; they know what they're doing and where to find the truth. When you turn to a group like this for support, you're obviously not trying to amend your ways."

The conversations of the San Diego superior reflect the tenor of "gay giftedness" of the St. Sebastian's Angels chatroom. "I only came out six or seven years ago," he tells the group, "and I too am finding more and more support from people whose lives I allow myself to touch. They are starved out there, especially gay Catholics." "I have been the VD (vocations director) for 12 years, and the provincial for the last eight of these same years. I've had men on my council and on the formation team who have tried to keep gays out of our candidacy program.... I encouraged gay men to stay with us...." In a later conversation, he says, "I left vocation work after 12 years straight (if I can use that expression). I wonder what [they] would have thought if they knew I was gay and encouraging men to join us? I have been very well thought of by the province as a whole, but if they knew ... I wonder?" He behooves one member, who is unhappy with is present psychiatrist, to get a "REAL shrink" (i.e., a gay-friendly counselor). To another, he says, "Welcome to THE support group! I have been in one for four years. As you get to know other priests in your area who are gifted with being gay, and with whom you feel you would like to share your journey plunge in and ask them. In my group five are gay and one [is] gay friendly."

The superior invites the other members of the site to visit him. "I'm in San Diego, so when you want to defrost, cum [sic] on down." Speaking of nude beaches, he says "Since I'm in San Diego, I go to Black's Beach near La Jolla.... I spend my day off at Black's -- talk about feeling free and at one with God and nature; not to mention some of His two-legged beautiful creations! The north end is the gay section!" He adds, "I sometimes wonder when I go to province retreats and there are communal showers why no one ever comments (at least to me) about me not having a tan line!" and "at 5'11" and weighing 169, I still wear Speedo's or the briefest I can find."

Members of the St. Sebastian's site also share their sexual preferences. Says the San Diego superior, "Several friends are heavy in to leather, S&M and MORE. Me, I like gentle, warmth and no pain, with or without leather to set the mood. But some men want (need) the whipping boy and crisco. Not I." In another message to the group, the prior talks about his reaction to the lifetime ban on pastoral ministry to homosexual persons imposed by the Vatican on Sr. Jeanine Gramick and Fr. Robert Nugent. "I have just finished a letter to Bishop Fiorenza re. Jeanine and Bob. I'm asking him to form a committee of open-minded bishops to do a study WITH gays and lesbians at the grassroots level. That's what Jeannine and Bob did. If the bishops did it, who knows what could develop." He is also one of the signers of a letter of support for Sr. Gramick and Fr. Nugent, which appeared in September, 1999.

* * *

In addition to his recent membership in the St. Sebastian group, the superior also used to facilitate a "Gay and Lesbian Catholic" support group at Santa Sophia parish in Spring Valley, pastored by Fr. Michael Ratajczak. In May, 1998, I attended a session to observe what was taught to the openly homosexual members in that group.

I was the first person to arrive that evening. After being directed to the meeting room by Santa Sophia's director of religious education, Sr. Alyce Waters, the superior arrived. I asked Father if I would need my Bible and the Catechism for the session; he said "No, we go by 'Always Our Children' (the U.S. bishops' letter to parents of homosexually-inclined children, which was later rewritten due to errors.)"

After the rest of the participants arrived, Father introduced himself and gave some of his background. In addition to his then-current position as vocations director, he said he had worked with parishes throughout the state of California and a couple in Oregon. He had been involved in HIV/AIDS ministry since 1983 and is the former pastor of Mother of Good Counsel Church in Hollywood, a parish known for its "gay-friendliness," where, he said, "I dealt with many members of the gay community."

Father said that the then-current diocesan guidelines on ministry to homosexually-inclined persons were in the process of revision, and that "Bishop Brom wants gay outreach ministry to be parish-based." He added that Santa Sophia was the first parish in the San Diego diocese to "go public" with "gay ministry," and that its support meetings had coincidentally started the same day that the original version of "Always Our Children" was released. In addition to Santa Sophia, the priest said, other San Diego parishes with "gay ministry" include St. Didacus and Christ the King. One participant remarked, "St. Didacus is so gay that same-sex couples kiss on the lips during the sign of peace."

Another participant recalled a "tirade" by Fr. Scott McColl, then-pastor of St. Didacus, against "a bunch of old men in Rome." The prior sympathized and spoke of "monolithic religions" that have "lots of structures" which incur "lots of guilt," adding "Kneelers are passe." Santa Sophia, St. Didacus and Christ the King, as well as St. Patrick's, St. Luke's and St. Jude's Shrine of the West, are regular participants in the annual Balboa Park AIDS Walk, held the first Sunday of October -- Respect Life Sunday -- each year. Proceeds from the walk benefit, among other organizations, the Lesbian and Gay Men's Center in Hillcrest, which distributes condoms and teaches homosexually-inclined persons how to "negotiate" sex risks.

Of the 10 other participants in that May, 1998 meeting, two people -- a man and a woman -- admitted that they were involved in active, live-in relationships with a same-sex partner. When the woman, who had been "partnered" with another woman for about 18 years, said she felt funny about going up to receive Holy Communion and was not yet able to bring herself to do so, the prior asked, "Why not?" His tone implied that she should not feel any misgivings about doing so; at no time did he counsel her to end her relationship, go to Confession first, or otherwise amend her life before reception of the Eucharist.

The men's superior said that no matter how tired he is, he always attends the Dignity "Masses," currently held at the First Unitarian Church at 4190 Front Street, on Sunday nights. He said that although he is unable to concelebrate, he goes in order to be "a sign of welcome for the Catholic Church," and expressed outrage that such Masses cannot be held in an actual Catholic Church. (In May 1997, the auxiliary bishop of Capetown, South Africa, whose photograph appears on the St. Sebastian website, sent his "best wishes" to Dignity San Diego on the 25th anniversary of Dignity's founding.)

Throughout the session, the superior expressed the same ideas that pervaded the St. Sebastian discussion group. "The Church's understanding of sexual acts seems to cloud over a deeper reality," he said. "We are not defined by what society says, or even some of the Church stuff. Our struggle with the Church goes beyond who I go to bed with. As we look at how Christ is working in our life -- whether we're impatient, whether we're horny -- then we can deal with all the human elements."

Concludes Stephen Brady about the St. Sebastian's website, "This is not about bashing homosexuals per se, but about clergy and their promises to defend the vow of celibacy, at the same time defending and engaging in this type of activity. They can't be teaching the truth and be devoted to the church. If one of these guys is hearing the confession of you teenage son or the young man who had a homosexual relationship, how on earth can they guide him? They are supposed to take people to heaven with them, but they are in no shape to minister to anybody."

TOP