ARTICLES

People Think They Can Do It Themselves

San Diegans Confess

By Robert Kumpel

At All Hallows Church on Mount Soledad, Monsignor Gilfillan's Palm Sunday homily included an exhortation for congregants to go to Confession. After Mass ended, a few parishioners shared their views on the Sacrament.

Don Uphoff says that he last went to Confession 12 years ago. "Sure I'm concerned about it, but at this point I don't have any plans to go. I ought to go pretty often" (he laughs). Uphoff doesn't think the priests are particularly concerned whether he goes or not. "It's not steady in their homilies -- it doesn't keep repeating itself in every homily throughout the year. I don't know what might be said about it from the pulpit would cause me to do things differently. I don't have difficulty with the concept of Confession, so I guess I ought to be going. I don't know that I have to share my transgressions and sins with a priest, but having been reared in the Catholic Church, it still bothers me to this day that I'm not a regular confessor, but I attend Mass daily. That alone is a little incongruous that I would be willing to attend Mass on a daily basis, but not go to Confession!"

Paul Zindell last went to Confession six weeks ago. "I go every two or three months. That's about how often I ought to do it. I hear priests say very little to encourage it. I think there's confusion as to whether people need to or not. Some people have the idea that they don't have to anymore. That came out about 20 years ago." Zindell seemed unconcerned regarding the possibility of widespread sacrilegious Communions. "I think it's up to the individual. I don't think that's a defining problem."

Carol Reilly went to Confession just one week before Palm Sunday. "Because it was Easter season and because it was part of a mission they were having here. I normally go once a year, in the Easter season. That's enough. The priest may talk once a year about going. It doesn't disturb me that less people are going. I was raised in the old Church where it was just custom to go. I think it has very therapeutic and cleansing possibilities for people, which possibly they go to psychiatrists and psychologists to get the same effect, but, on the other hand, I never liked going to Confession. I still don't, except this year was a beautiful communal Penance service, and I loved it. I felt very uplifted. I normally don't like to go, because it reminds me of my grade school days -- the standing in line, the penance, the fear, thinking of all the things I've done wrong. Just about five years ago I had a priest bawl me out!"

Mary Ann Russell last went to Confession a month ago. "I usually go every one to three months. I ought to go every month. I hear nothing from the pulpit and I think they should say more about it. People don't realize the graces they get from going. It would be nice to hear some witness talks -- people's experience about going too. I think people don't comprehend what a gift it is." When asked if she thought there was a problem with widespread sacrilegious Communions, she said, "According to the laws of the Church, yes, but I don't like to judge myself."

Nathan Dorsey likes to go to Confession. "I went just a few days ago. I've been five times since December. I go whenever I feel the need -- whenever I feel I've sinned and need to be forgiven or when someone has sinned against me and I need to confess that too. A lot of people don't realize that." Dorsey says that Confession is occasionally encouraged in homilies. "I believe it was mentioned once last month. I think most people are afraid. They think that Confession is being judged by a human being, not realizing that the priest is the embodiment of Christ Himself and they are not being judged. Also, the weight of other people's sins upon them can be taken away and purified and you receive a state of grace when the Holy Spirit comes down upon you. Most people look at it as going in and telling all the bad things and that's not what it is. It's going in to relieve that pain that you have from whatever is wrong." Dorsey didn't like speculating on the possibility of widespread sacrilegious Communions. "I think that would be wrong to receive Communion in a state of mortal sin, but that's up to each individual person to deal with -- between him and God."

Karen Zlatic last went to Confession a few years ago. "I go every few years, but I ought to go much more often. Time and laziness are probably the reasons I don't go. I don't hear as much in homilies about it as I used to. I think if they impressed it upon us more, it might encourage us to go more. I think most people feel it's that important. Maybe they would go if they felt it was easier for them to go. It's not impressed upon them like it was in the 60s and 70s."

The secular concepts of personal choice and sin being a problem strictly between oneself and God are more apparent at St. Brigid's in Pacific Beach. A parish with lots of young adults in attendance, most seem unconcerned about the need for Confession. One young male parishioner in his twenties, waiting for Mass while holding a bundle of palms, responded to an interview request with, "F-- you! Get the f-- outta here!"

Steve Sabo's last Confession was two weeks ago. "I go about once a month. That's about enough. I hear priests encourage it at Mass, too." Sabo was not sure why more people don't go to Confession anymore. "That's tough. I guess it's a matter of their own personal opinions, maybe attitudes changing on what they believe is right and wrong. If they do receive a sacrilegious Communion, it's a misunderstanding of their faith."

Greg Redmond said he hasn't been to Confession in years. "I don't go very often. I should go about once a year. Yep, the priests tell us to go -- they just said so last week. I go to church, but I just don't make it to Confession." Redmond seemed unconcerned as to why more people don't go. "I don't know. I think it's all individual."

Jennifer Gasko can't remember her last Confession. "Maybe 20 years ago. I don't go. I don't know how often I should go. The priests say we should -- they encourage it most often in the Lenten season (laughs). I guess it's my whole religious view in general. I don't mind going to Confession and sitting face-to-face either. I never felt the need to hide behind the screen. I guess a lot of people feel like they would be criticized or looked down on. People are probably embarrassed to confess what they have to!"

Edward Gernat went to Confession a week ago. "I probably go about once a year. I should probably go about four or five times a year. I've heard more about it at Mass in the last few weeks. There's been a stronger push on it as we get closer to Holy Week. I don't hear much about it other than that. I think it's not discussed enough. I think there's a changing belief. A lot of people don't think that they need it to make their peace with God." Unlike the others who refused to speculate, Gernat believes sacrilegious Communions are widespread. "Yes. Even for me, probably."

The eleven o'clock Palm Sunday Mass at St. Gregory the Great in Scripps Ranch is packed. Children sit on the steps of the entry area and bodies cover the walls of the circular church. The Blessed Sacrament Chapel gets a lot of use as an alternate exit for the men's restroom. Many parishioners are seated in the courtyard outside the main church doors on benches that surround the tile labyrinth, listening to the Mass on loudspeakers.

Joseph Zawaideh's last Confession was one year ago. "I go once or twice a year. I should go four or five times a year. I don't think I attend Mass often enough to know what the priests say about it. I attend twice a month. I don't have any opinion about the drop in Confessions, because I'm just not involved enough to intelligently answer that question."

Donna Rex's last Confession was in 1988. "Right before our wedding. I don't go to Confession, but I'd say if you really committed a serious transgression, then you should go. The priests will preach about it before every big holiday like Easter and Christmas. I think the reduced number of Confessions is a sign of the way the Church is changing. I don't think most people feel comfortable. I don't think it's an easy thing to go in there and bare yourself to another human being. I think most people make their penance to God directly."

Paul Heidenreich hasn't been to Confession in years. "I don't go, but I probably ought to go monthly. I just haven't done it. I hear the priests talk about it fairly often. I think there's a lot of people who think they can do it themselves."

Rob Clause last went to Confession two years ago. "That was the first time I went. I was going through the RCIA process at the time. I ought to go much more regularly, perhaps even once a month. I just don't think I've made it the priority I should. I don't hear about it from priests a lot, but with some frequency. It's just a matter of people not making it a priority. Everyone thinks they're extremely busy and some people allocate their priorities one way and some another way and that's what it comes down to."

It's been eight years since Anna Golding went to Confession. "The last time was when we got married. I guess I go once every eight years! I actually think we should go to Confession when we feel it's necessary." When asked if she felt it was necessary in the last eight years, she replied, "No. Not really. I don't hear priests mentioning it. I think people are doing it a little more privately. People are confessing in their own way, telling God their sins."

Colleen Guerra can't remember her last Confession, although she receives Communion every week. "It was a long time ago, probably before I got married 15 years ago. I don't go often enough, obviously (laughs)! I should go about once a week before Communion. I don't think it's focused on very strongly in homilies. I try to concentrate on the Mass and I don't make the extra trip over to make a formal Confession. I ask for forgiveness through Mass and other ways."

Shirley Strong said her last Confession was "last year. I go about once a year, but I ought to twice a year! (laughs) I don't hear priests preaching about it. It's not as strong as it was when I was growing up, but I think that's good. I think they used to instill the fear that if you didn't go to Confession, then you went to hell and I think that was wrong." Regardless of her disgust for instilling a fear of damnation, Strong thinks more people should go. "I think they're missing something. I shouldn't say that, considering I only go once a year!"

Phillip Chukwueke hasn't been to Confession for a long time, but his voice brims with hope as he shares his resolution to go more often. "Last Tuesday, I came for Confession here. I wasn't able to go, because the line was very long. But I also decided that, beginning this Easter, I would re-activate the process of Confession. I figured that if you can actually humble yourself enough to go to the priest and confess it, then the strength of that resolution will be much deeper than if you just kneel down every Sunday and confess directly to God. I will be going again very soon. I have not gone often at all, but hopefully, I will be going more often. In my case, I should probably go once a month. In this parish, I've heard about Confession in homilies, but it's not something I hear all the time."

Chukwueke doesn't know why more people don't go to Confession, but he explains what led to his initial reluctance to go. "When I grew up in Nigeria, because of the crowded parishes, they practiced general absolution. That meant showing up and instead of the traditional format of Confession, the priests prayed before the Congregation and everybody confessed their sins to God and that was it. From that process, you begin to lose the need to go to Confession the traditional way. But for me, it makes more sense to actually go through that process of confessing, and through that process, I hope the resolution will be much stronger."

Victoria Madelli's last Confession was one year ago. "I normally go once a year. I try to be a good person, so once a year is enough. I don't hear priests talk about it in their homilies. I don't know if people aren't going to Confession or not. If there's a drop, I think it's maybe because people aren't going to church as much and families are fragmented instead of being close together. That's why we go to church, to stay close together."

Marie McGowan went to Confession just last week. "I go once a year, maybe twice. I was doing my Easter duty. I think you ought to go whenever you have a serious sin or have done something you need to discuss. I often hear about it in homilies. I have no opinion about what other people do or don't do."

McGowan's sister, Anita Burton, went to her last Confession one year ago. "I go about once a year. I would like to do it more often, but I just sometimes can't find the time to fit it into my shedule. The priests don't talk about it often, but there's kind of an understanding. Here it's said every now and then." Like most other respondents, Burton thinks the low attendance at Confessions are a personal matter. "It's pretty much up to that individual. A lot of things have changed and progressed so some people might not feel that they need to do that as often."

Arnold Ascherfeld last went to Confession "the last time I changed my oil. That would be about three thousand miles. I'm supposed to go every three thousand miles--that's what the priest told me. I'm dead serious. His name was Father Cavanaugh, he used to be at the Church of the Good Shepherd in Mira Mesa. He asked me, 'Do you have a car?' I said yeah, so he asked, 'When was the last time you changed your oil?' and I told him I just changed it. So he said, 'Tell you what, why don't you go to Confession every three thousand miles? Think of it as a spiritual oil change.' I believe I ought to go maybe a bit more often -- every time I realize I've done something pretty wrong, but that's a good marker. Actually, I don't hear priests talk about Confession much. I think people don't go because they don't understand what the Sacrament of Reconciliation really is. I think most people are stuck in their childhood anxiety. It's a personal confrontation, y'know? And a lot of people have a problem with that. I think if people would start to think of the Sacrament of Reconciliation as exactly that -- not as Confession. Confession is part of the sacrament. Reconciliation is what it's all about, reconciling with the Lord, yourself and whoever you may have harmed by your sin."

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