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A Semester in the Wasteland

Freshman Found Little Faith at USD

BY ANNA KRESTYN

Michaela Beard, 19, would be a freshman in her second semester at the University of San Diego, had she not left the school in disgust after the fall semester of 2004. This young woman from Bakersfield enrolled at the school with the belief that she was embarking on a four-year journey that would make her a stronger, better informed Catholic. She learned within the first week of her stay there, before classes had even officially begun, that this belief was far from the truth. "When I visited the school," she says, "it was on a visiting day and it became clear to me later that the picture I had was not accurate."

Once enrolled as a student, Beard noticed during the freshman orientation activities an emphasis on "Catholic/ Christian" events. She attended a prayer service at which the students were invited to talk privately with a priest. "They told us to tell the priest just one sin, and they didn't call it confession. I think it was because they were trying to involve all the non-Catholic students."

Feeling doubtful about the watered-down penance service, Michaela refrained from taking part. "My first week, I got an e-mail about Coming-Out Awareness Week. A luncheon was hosted for people to come and share their coming-out experiences and support the homosexual community. I was shocked."

The e-mail Michaela received from the students group stated, "National Coming Out Awareness Week ... was created to promote awareness regarding the process of coming out in the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning (GLBTQ) community as well as to demonstrate support for members of this community. This week in the University Center foyer, there will be a big poster that says, 'I support the LGBTQ Community.' If you do support this community, please sign your name and 'come out' as LGBTQ or as an ally."

Shocked at the e-mail, Beard sent an e-mail of her own to one of the university ministers to complain about the event. "The response I got from the head minister was, 'You're coming from a hard place, so I can understand your shock, but we need to be welcoming.'"

Beard later learned that the head minister belonged to a campus group called Rainbow Educators, which, on its website, states its mission as "aim[ing] to help the University of San Diego move toward greater awareness, knowledge, and inclusion of its lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered (LGBT) community.

Beard also e-mailed university president Mary Lyons, writing, "I am a freshman student at University of San Diego, and a practicing Roman Catholic. I came to USD thinking this school would help me become more knowledgeable about my faith. Instead it has reiterated how corrupt a setting can be. From the teaching of evolution in biology, to the discussion of surrogate mothers in sociology, to the "Coming Out Awareness" week, USD has continuously failed to live up to my expectations. I find it ironic that this school professes to be a "Catholic" University but fails to teach any beliefs that coincide with the teachings of the Catholic Church.... I'm sorry to say that devout Catholic students are not going to be attracted to this school as long as Catholic tradition and teachings are not evident here. I think it is your duty as president to make a necessary change at USD. I am wondering what you will do to make this university not just Catholic in name but in teachings as well."

Beard never received a response from Lyons.

Despite such discouragements, Beard became involved in some campus groups with more traditional Catholic values. One such group was Students For Life, which she says consisted of only about five members. The senior girl who headed the group proved to be one of Beard's few friends. "She told me that she was the one student she knew who had a truly Catholic voice. She said pretty much everybody loses their faith by senior year."

Beard felt that the pro-life group received little support from the administration. "Other groups, such as United Front (a minority group) had a huge room that was always decorated. But the Students for Life Group had no designated room and always had to meet in a student's room. That made it hard for us to keep it up."

She was also part of a College Republicans group, but she felt that the group pulled in a more liberal than conservative direction. Around campus, she was as disappointed by the behavior and morals of the students as she was with the administration. "There was no enforcement of the residence rules," she says. A number of times she reported rule-breaking, such as men in women's rooms and intoxicated students, to the resident assistants, only to be shrugged off. "What do you want me to do about it?" one of them responded.

Beard also found that a near universal lack of piety pervades the student life at the university. "I knew no one in my dorm who went to church or had morals similar to mine," she says. "I prayed for just one person to have as a real friend."

One semester at the school gave Beard, currently attending junior college in Bakersfield, all the certainty she needed to make the decision to withdraw. "By the end," she says, "when I was a hostess for visitors, I was telling all the girls I hosted, 'If you're a truly Catholic person, don't come to this school. You will not get a Catholic education.'"

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